Peter

Yesterday I talked about how I often identify with Peter, and today's reading - finishing up Matthew, and beginning Acts I really got a glimpse of how his life was transformed by the Holy Spirit. Peter went from denying Jesus to becoming a powerful preacher of the gospel.

All of which is made possible by the death & resurrection of Jesus. The ultimate sacrifice and act of obedience. As I've read through Matthew you see that Jesus, while being fully God, was fully man. He got hungry. He felt. He cried out to His Father "Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?" - "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" He felt the sting of being separated from God - Can you relate?

I gave my life to Christ a very young age, 4 or so, but I really began in intimate journey with Him 12 years ago. I go through periods where I feel that sting of separation from my Creator, by no means comparing mine to what Jesus felt - because He did no wrong. I deserve the pain and the consequence of death for being a sinful being. "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift from God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord." I'm not sure I will ever understand the depths of the grace of God. Even today, as my anger is kindled at the feeling of injustice in the Casey Anthony trial, I think of how she is not beyond God's grace. God rejoices when even one gives thier life to Him - all those parables about lost sheep & coins, and that includes Casey Anthony.

God, I pray that I would take rest in your abundant grace. I pray that I would share that love and grace with others, so that they might taste & see of your goodness. We are all in desperate need of you - our God, Creator, Savior, Redeemer!! I can't fathom that not only do you want to save us from our fate of eternal death and separation from You, you have great things in store for us. Forgive me for not always beleiving that. Your plan for me is far greater than my own. Continue to redeem this broken vessel Lord Jesus.

Day 2

Thoughts on day 2's reading - Matthew 13-23

A lot of parables, which at times don't make sense, but thankfully! Jesus explains them, for the most part, the Holy Spirit does the rest! What theme's did I see over and over? Jesus' love and compassion for people, all people, and his emphasis on loving, looking out for, and serving the poor. A phrase often used in reference to the Pharisees & Sadducees - 'You brood of vipers!' I alway's shudder when I read through Jesus rebuking the Pharisees & Sadducees, and I think it's because I feel like I can often fall into times where I have the head knowledge, but not the heart engagement. Nevertheless, it leads me to pray - I pray that I am not a hypocrite, or dishonoring God when I speak of Him or am sharing His Word. I ask Him to reveal those things so that I can seek change, through Him.

There is actually a lot of passages that I love in these 10 chapters. The Parable's regarding God's joy in just one person coming to know Him. I still find myself in awe, in a very childlike way, on Jesus feeding the 4 and 5 thousand + people. In reading about the crowds that followed Jesus, I try to picture myself there, and I feel like I would just follow along, and stare at Him. How sweet would that be... to get a glimpse. I get choked up and teary-eyed just thinking about it. One day... :)

And then there's Peter... I have always connected to Peter. "O you of little faith" in chapter 14, then in chapter 16 as Peter proclaims Jesus is the Christ, "on this rock I will build my church... I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven..." I know this isn't unique to just me, but man, I feel that battle - between faith and logic. Something I keep thinking about is that my faith and logic don't always cohabitate well together!

May we seek to love the Lord God with all our heart, mind, and soul, and love our neighbors as ourselves! Oh, also, I've decided Will & I are going to read through the New Testament in his kiddie Bible too! :) I think I get just as much out of it's simple 15-20 word sections!

New In 30

Our church is doing a challenge called "New in 30," which means reading the New Testament in 30 days. I personally love a good challenge in reading the Word, and actually thought it was just what I needed as I've hit a lull in my Old Testament readings.

Today's assignment was to read Matthew 1-12, that's right, 12 chapters in one day! I actually got a little head start yesterday so I wouldn't be as overwhelmed by it today. This was much needed as Matthew starts out with the lineage of Jesus, briefly goes through JC's birth & before I knew it we were in the Sermon on the Mount in chapter 5. I alway's kind of find myself dumbfounded as I read through Jesus' preaching here, because it's such a slap in the face to any rule-keeping or checklist following religion that is living in my heart. Praise the Lord for his graciousness at the end of chapter 11, which felt like a breath of fresh air:

²⁵ At that time Jesus said, “I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. ²⁶ Yes, Father, for this is what you were pleased to do. ²⁷ “All things have been committed to me by my Father. No one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him. ²⁸ “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ²⁹ Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰ For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

I'm coming Lord!! I'm weary and burdened! I'm alway's feeling conflicted and/or convicted when reading these chapters, because Jesus is calling us to become the least in order to receive the greatest reward. I can't exactly explain or comprehend what this means, but I know that I don't always seek to put others above myself... I seek selfish gain.

As I'm flipping back through the pages I read I see there is so much good stuff - the Salt & Light section, Laying up Treasures in Heaven, Ask & it will be Given sections... all contain verses that have really hit me at one time or another. But for this read through, this is all I've got...

Spring Break

Well I guess since it's still officially spring, Bo isn't out of school, and the weather is still "springy"... I can still post about our spring breat that was like 2 months ago, or maybe just 1. I took a couple of days off work and Bo & I took Will down to Cincinnati. We did a little outlet shopping because the boy had grown out of most of his clothes, and we went to the Newport Aquarium. All were fun, but we were most excited about the 75 degree weather we drove into! We soaked up every minute of walking around the outlet mall, and then went back to the hotel for some swimming! See pics below!

We Interrupt This Special....

I thought my title adequately described what happened to my Lent venture... My Lent adventure was interrupted with the knowledge that Baby Kessler #2 is on the way! :) So not a negative roadblock, but a huge one nonetheless. You may be wondering why becoming pregnant would interfere with one's journey in research and discipline.... well, my whole discipline meltdown happened when I was pregnant for Will. Thankfully, I have not had "morning" sickness this go round, but the fatigue & nausea are still full swing.

We are super excited for Baby #2, but it's overwhelming too. I feel like my energy meter was already maxed out, but I know that God will provide and in His grace and mercy He will get us through it!

Lent Findings Round 1

Don't be confused with lint findings - I haven't been digging out the dust bunnies from under the couch cushions! haha

Seriously though, found some interesting and encouraging things on Wikipedia regarding Lent. Check this out:

The traditional purpose of Lent is the preparation of the believer — through prayer, penitence, almsgiving and self-denial — for the annual commemoration during Holy Week of the Death and Resurrection of Jesus, which recalls the events linked to the Passion of Christ and culminates in Easter, the celebration of the Resurrection of Jesus Christ.

Sounds right up my alley! I'm all about prayer, penitence (repenting of sin), almsgiving (what I took from the definition I read is giving to others from your material possessions), and self-denial ("take up your cross and follow me" Matthew 16:24). All in which to celebrate the death, burial, and resurrection of Christ!!!

Also, found this section interesting:

Converts to Christianity followed a strict catechumenate or period of instruction and discipline prior to baptism. In Jerusalem near the close of the fourth century, classes were held throughout Lent for three hours each day. With the legalization of Christianity (by the Edict of Milan) and its later imposition as the state religion of the Roman Empire, its character was endangered by the great influx of new members. In response, the Lenten fast and practices of self-renunciation were required annually of all Christians, both to show solidarity with the catechumens, and for their own spiritual benefit. The less zealous converts were thus brought more securely into the Christian fold.

Hard to think of terms of the "legalization" of Christianity isn't it? We're so used to our religious freedom. Our ability to choose, or reject, whatever beliefs and ideals we want.

I'm getting more excited about this journey!

Discipline: Spirituality

Once again... it's been awhile. I've been visiting my blog a lot lately thinking I really need to update this thing, but haven't taken the time to do it. Much of that coming from my lack of discipline, hence the title of this blog.

I think I should preface this blog with the terms in which I'm using the word discipline, because it has some different meanings, and in my head I do not consider myself a very disciplined person, but others may look at me, my life, the choices I make and agree or disagree depending on what they are judging it off of. I think this definition fits what I'm thinking the closest -

to bring to a state of order and obedience by training and control. (from my buddy dictionary.com) There are 2 ends of the spectrum, like most things in life, and I'm talking about discipline in the healthy sense of the word. Not a robotic regimen, but the freedom that comes from being obedient.

I've decided to break this blog up into multiple posts, because as I got going it was getting lengthy...

First topic of discussion - Spirituality. As a Christ-follower (Christian) I believe that I need to be in the Word, in prayer, and in community. Due to my lack of discipline, I currently am in the Word... when I feel like it. Pray... when I get around to it. In community... when it pursues me. All of that needs to change. Not out of legalism, but because I know what it's like to have those things working and functioning proper in my life, and I like it - I feel God's presence and work through these things. With lent approaching I have been thinking about these things, and I'm starting to pray about what God wants this thing to look like.

I've never "celebrated" Lent, and I can't really tell you a whole lot about why it's practiced or where it started. I know it has to do with prayer & fasting leading up to Easter, and I'm sure Google can help me find some answers, but I believe in prayer & fasting all throughout the year, and have not felt led in the past to do anything in particular during the season of Lent. Until this year... so here I am!

Spirituality has to be the first area I start because doing anything of my own will is for nothing. It all has to be for God and His glory!

So what are the other area's of my life I'm dissatisfied with, and have gotten thrown under the lack of discipline train? Exercise/Healthy Living & Money

Galations 5:1 It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.